28th January 2010

Today bb gav me surprise.... I am so happy...hehe... But bb dun wan let me know how bb feel b4 we together... i just hope to know all of tis... jus wanna know... nthg else.. My head always keep asking myself wat u feel toward me b4 v r together...so can bb tel me....I wanna know the truth not the word tat oly make me happy...

bb so good... hehe... I know... not i dun blif u... is myself no confident... in my heart bb already very good to me... i know.... bb do so much thg for me... I am so touch.... thanks bb.... anyway so bb dun bother me whether wat is my mood but bb mus always happy..ten bb only can make me happier slowly....so bb mus b very patient... if bb very happy dun bother wat is my mood n talk dun bother I listen or not...ten straight I will slowly happier...ok?? ten I ma not angry lor....good idea....hehe =_='

LOVE BB FOREVER... DUN ASK ME I WILL WAIT U OR NOT....EVEN U DUN WAN TO MARRY ME ASO I WILL WAIT U TILL U MARRY ME DE....HEHE... BUT BB DUN BULLY ME HAR AFTER I SAID THIS....BLEK

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY 3 MONTHS.... HAPPY FOREVER....I AM WISHING MYSELF ASO..HEHE

28th January 2010

28th Jan is our 3 months anniversary.

we live together already 3 months time.

i more understand baby & more love baby..

but baby still dun understand me..

so sad..

baby still huai yi i will leave baby anot..

dun think wat attitude do you have that will make me love you..

i can say that is thg..

love is love..

for me is no becoz of what..

i love 'YOU'..

not your attitude..

this week is abit busy la..

baby must wait me ma..

i already said will leave machines after february..

the life i want is happyness..

sometimes becoz of some NTG that baby dun believe me..

than we argue..

that is so waste lor...

i juz like a normal life..

dun want always argue..

ok??

sorry baby..

this few days no time to write blog..

and no computer also..

^^'

i love you baby..

27th January 2010

the blog becoming useless between us liao... cos bb no time to write blog bb bz working the whole week.... even not only tis week bb aso keep working... no time to accompany b4 tat xm then rush account now stock take then later bz wit machines event...always machines machines only... even work aso mus bring back to do.... I hate machines....I hate bb only like machines more than me.... I wonder is it I am too greedy... I understand we got our own life and fren... I too understand I cannot stop u from speaking to ur fren especially girl...but I really tried my best not to control u cos I dun wan u to loss all ur happiness tat only u can get when u r wit ur fren... tat feeling is only can come only wit fren and I forever is a impossible to giv u tat feeling.... But everytime when I know u wanna go meet ur fren or chat on phone... Like now tis moment one of ur fren sms u... even I dunno regarding wat... but I really feel jealous...I dun un why I becoming so easily jealous... Mayb not only jealous aso scare to loss u... I hav no confident on myself... I am not pretty, not kind, not tall and it can consider very short, not smart, attitude so bad..... I really cannot think of one thing tat can make u fall in love wit me... I really scare one day when u met a gal tat is really perfect and she is much better than me 100%, and u fall in love with her or she fall in love wit her... then I really cannot think wat I goin to b... mayb end up with silly...or watever.... I really frighten wat my mum always warn me will happen... she always said u may met a better gal... even how good u r in her heart... this she admit she will always think tat may happen even how much thing I tried to convince her.... I really loss all my confident... b4 knowing u I am so proud of myself... I think to b so independent... so confident... after together with u... I changed so muc..however when I saw u I feel the happy in my heart and tat always cause me to smile naturally from my heart... and I become so dependance on u.... i like to depend on u... but sometime I scare u wil feel I am so fan... my mum always ask my how ur bf can tahan u...I really scare one day u will hate me...
at first when my brother gav me c the lighter of the design od football....d first thing in my mind I thinking u will like it so much....then I asked my brother to giv me cos I told him u like football so much... then he said this is I really fall in depth in ur love.... then at last he gav to me... When I got that I thinking tomolo morning I gav u wat s ur reaction I imagine it and I started to feel so happy... but finally jus tis moment u called me u told me tat tomolo u r not going to meet me for breakfast... u really make me so down... I think of it I feel like crying....my daddy said he wanted the lighter then I dun wan to giv him then he like saying I wat aso giv u... then he say tis one can't buy aso next time... ask me to keep for him... then I dun wan bother wat he said and I still wanna giv u and I keep telling him u like football.... then my dad say he aso like ma... ten I say no u like it so much I wanna giv u... ten I said if tis is fish design ten I will only giv him la... only he keep quiet liao...


Anyhow... I hate tis week... I hate machines forever.... I hate the word of stock take... I hate u danger urself... I wanna make myself dangerous 100% more than u....

Thanks to my Baby

11st JAN 2010

Today is my 21st birthday.

in the past 20 years i oso wont realise that my 21st birthday will got my baby..

and oso can means as lou po..

i ever pass my birthday like today..

feel so happiness..

without baby i will be pass my birthday alone..

without baby i wont feel so happiness..

without baby i dun have my future..

without baby my life is still da gei everyday..

without baby my knowledge of account is still insufficient..

without baby i dint know what i must do now..

without baby i dint know to earn more money..

without baby my life wont so colourful..

With baby i know who is my love in the rest of my life..

nowonder what is happen..

baby is still my baby..

and mayb lou po..

i love you forever..

Most memorable event

Today is between 9th January 2010 and 10th January 2010....Bb today after celebrating with his fren he came to give me a surprise by already reached my home....I felt very happy actually....Then bb was sick and flu....I am worry that bb will fall sick cos bb said if fall sick then bb's kidney side will feel very pain...I dun like bb so suffer...

Then v went out to 7-11 to buy medicine and 100 plus..but nothing we can get over there...100 plus but cold only available...

After bought it at one of the grocery shop then we stay at car there to chat later I suggest to go the near to river side next next to my building....then later on got 2 polices came to disturb.... Suddenly they said wanna bring us go police station... then bb so angry and start no manner to quarrel with them... make them even so angry.... bb somemore close the car door so hard and split in front of the police... then bb so lanci to them and said speak english la...OMG....the police seem like wanna start fighting wit bb....I am so scare try to cool down them and talk to them nicely...

I tried to stop bb but I can't tat moment I understand that my word is not so important to bb... I am so scare and can do nothing and finally I cried...

1st I cried cos I am too scare to go police station
2nd I heard many ppl said guy will normally scare gal cried, so I hope the police will giv me chance after I cried...
3rd I also actually acting a bit...act like I very scare police and dun like to go police station

then I start cooling the police...I start talking and explaining to him.... One of the police I know I have successfully persuade him....and I can feel he already forgive and started to seem like letting us go... but another one who I feel the most difficult to handle... Then, he came after making some call..I not sure who he call to... later on the 1st police already stop talking I think he may already understand or already giv me wash brain liao... the 2nd one I tried and cry more serious and try to persuade him in different way.... Luckily both also scare of me crying and letting us go.... I remembered this word Jangan menangis lagi....haha... wat I guessed really true and the cry technique really useful...

Bb promised me in wat situation aso wun angry already...

Bb must do wat promised...bb know I hate ppl lying to me...

Even this matter make me so scare and of cos I dun wan this to b happen ever ever in my life anymore.... so embarrassing...saying me like the kind of dirty gal....I hate police being so not respecting ppl feeling and image....If I am the lawyer I surely sue him from judging and talking something rubbish which has spoilt my image and characteristic and embarrassing me......

Anyway, this has give a very special experience and memorable event between us.... anyway the police also mayb have safe our two little life... cos v can't guess or know wat will happen... but there is aso a bad side of the police for simply say out some word without knowing the fact to judge us and spoilt my reputation... Under certain law, he can be sued.... I hate his word... I hate he said my pant.... That is so logic and so obvious tat the pant not purposely make it down de lo...really babi mean babi... advice islamic should eat more babi and eat less nasi lemak... cos their mind really lemak(lemah)....damn it...

my heart and mind still appear the scenario of just now....I am so scare and I thinking wat if I really went to police station and wat my parent and bb parent really to called to b there....and wat if bb still wanna to fight wit them... I am so worry one day bb really will cause problem wen one day I am not with u.... I start to worry so much... I worry not only today but in future... Bb must always keep in mind bb is mine... bb must take k and think of all possible result wen doing anything... I can't live without u.... If bb cos of temporary wanna show temper and cause trouble and spoilt all of our plan... do u think that is worth??? bb mus always think of me... think of me without u... I will not survive... please I begging u... dun ever cause any problem and dun show ur temper... it is not worth in watever situation... smart ppl wun show out the revenge.... u wanna do watever thing please think b4 u do... take revenge or reply aso must b in a smart way.... mayb some ppl known it as 奸人。。。。but I will known these ppl as smart ppl rather than a tricky....

My Feeling

Nothing decision i want to make..

i dun wan any ending..

the ending for us is after 50 or 60 years..

what in my heart is feel that i am very HURT and SAD..

It is really HURT me deeply..

when you say im kacao u but im care of you..

i feel very down when u say that..

i never say that i like machines..

i hate machines also..

i dun like ms lau oso..

but no wonder we dislike a ppl..

we also canot kill them right??

know what i means??

ya i like you that you can make me happy..

but there are many things i like you is because you are angeline ho shin ni..

i have decided to leave machine soon..

what in my mind is we want to cool down..

if i say many to you then u say im kacao you..

i dun wan to make you more angry..

I tell you now..

WHATEVER THINGS ARE HAPPEN

I ALSO WONT GIVE UP FOR OUR FUTURE..

dont ask me wat decision i wanna make again..

we still many things to do..

the plan on my birthday..

at chinese new year..

our pinkdragon..

our baby..

our car..

our dream house..

our dream life..

all i said are seriously..

i think for long time for making these all our future..

dun run away from me please..

and i promise never run away form you..

I LOVE YOU

 

5th January 2010

I hate this date... this day of every month.... I am so upset and my heart is so painful... Now I finally know that actually wat u like is machines... you like happiness... and that is why you love machines... you like me that wat you say always actually you like me cos I can make you happy.... You will hate me when I make u sad or moody... Like today... like the day always when we are together... I dun think we are the suitable in the sense of attitude or thinking... Mayb you have the thinking almost same with ms lau or u have too close with her... your time being with her are more than with me... I have give up on today... I hate machines especially account department... if you like being there then you just proceed on... I alreay said so many times you cannot drive so fast in any situation... if you want to drive like that then you just proceed on... you thinking that tell me every single thing and I am so easily angry and you decided not to tell me then of cos you can do it.. You like to go buy food yourself and left me there then you suppose to give me my bag and let me take my thing... I can walk myself.. I can accept watever... I think you send me the message and I know wat you wan to do... You no need to care about my feeling.. just said out wat u wan... I know you are tired and enough of standing with me... watever decision you want... watever ending you like... you jus let me know... I can accept and I promise.. I won't cry in front of you for any decision you make... please let me know by sending me a reply...thanks